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The Pretzel Scandal

The Pretzel Scandal
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I'm sure you're wondering how a gal like me ends up in a place like this. Well, it started with a few humble pretzel sales. . .

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Pretzel Wednesday was just a little weekly thing our school held to raise small funds for this or that. Soft, warm pretzels for all who remembered to bring a dollar. But things changed once we Excuse Proofed...

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Using our Push Messages, we sent parents a quick reminder on Tuesday night. Our school's weekly pretzel sales TRIPLED as a result! Pretzel Day had become a hit!

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Pretzel Wednesday was doing so well, in fact, we decided it was time to expand our operation. Pretzel Friday was a full 'Go!'

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When we began sending parents a reminder on Pretzel Day mornings, we cornered the school snack market. The dough changed hands fast - but The Life was even faster. . .

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No one believed that all the money came from pretzel sales. When the SSEC cracked down, it was hard and swift. They tagged us a B.I.T.E (Baked Irresistible Treat Enterprise) and threatened to shut us down.

The cash was too fluid. The sales - nearly impossible to verify. Rumors of corruption began to swirl. . .

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People were calling it PretzelGate; which only pumped pretzel popularity. Children thought PretzelGate was either a new type of fence made completely of pretzel; or a gateway to some glorious pretzel-filled place.

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The SSEC had seen enough.

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We were hit with 11 counts of emPretzelment. Our operation was shut down permanently.

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So, I'm out of the Pretzel game for good...

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... and I've been promoted to School Fundraising Coordinator! I've got some exciting ideas I'd love to share with you! Click Here and we'll crunch the numbers...

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